Sweet Almonds

Did you know that Arsenic smells and tastes like almonds?

I started to smell it in my drinks and taste it in my food. I would set my cup down or leave my food for a moment and return to a sweet almond smell.

I never knew arsenic could taste and smell so nice until my daughter, Maeve, tugged on my apron as I prepped that night’s dinner.

‘Mummy, do you want to hear a fun fact?’ Maeve’s little angel face stared up at me with her brown eyes, wide and wanting.

‘Sure sweetie,’ I said, too focused on chopping the carrots.  Maeve stayed silent for a moment.

She looked back at me and said cheerfully. 'Poison can taste like almonds'

Kids are strange at the best of times especially when they play. I remember looking after my niece for a day. She had sat me down and served me plastic food with an empty cup that she later told me was filled with lava. I laughed it off and played along.

I thought that it was one of those times.

‘That’s nice, where did you learn that?’ I nodded as I scooped the carrots into the pot.

‘School.’ Maeve skipped out of the kitchen, giggling to herself, leaving me in silence and alone in the kitchen.

The next morning, I woke up with daylight streaming into the room and the sweet smell of coffee. I sat up and looked over the bed to see James had already left for work. I turned to see a cup of coffee on the nightstand with a letter sitting beside it.  I opened the note to James’s handwriting.

I’ve taken Maeve to school. Hope you enjoy the coffee we made for you.

I reached over and brought the cold coffee to my lips, a slight hint of almond hit my tastebuds and nose. I held the cup away from me. I had thought that the normal milk might have gone off or they used the almond milk I usually use for baking instead.

I stepped into the cold kitchen, cup in hand. I opened the fridge to see only the almond milk left in the fridge. I breathed a sigh of relief and drank the rest of the coffee.

~ ~ ~

A happy tune from Maeve’s show played through the living room when James walked through the door, bag in hand. He placed the plastic bag on the kitchen counter, smiling as he kissed me, took off his jacket, and loosened his tie. 

‘I used the last of the normal milk when I made your coffee this morning, so I brought another one.’ He opened the fridge and placed the milk next to the almond milk.

‘Are you sure you didn’t use the Almond milk? The coffee tasted a bit sweet.’

James turned around ‘No, maybe it was sweet because I was the one who made it.’  A wide grin spread on his face.

‘And me, don’t forget I helped too!’ Maeve yelled over the sofa towards us.

With each passing day, I slept in more, waking up later and later, my eyes would slowly close as whenever I had a moment to myself, my head would droop forward before whipping my head back and trying to keep my eyes wide open.

‘Are you tired Mummy?’ Maeve asked as she stood at one of the hallway entrances.

I pushed myself up on the sofa, so I was sitting straight. Everything in my body ached, I could feel how weak and heavy my body had become.

‘A bit, how long was I asleep for?” I closed my eyes as I waited for a wave of pain to wash over my head.

‘A few hours. Mummy, are you okay?’ She had taken a single step forward. ‘You know that being tired and having headaches is a sign you’ve been poisoned? Have you been poisoned?’  There was curiosity in her tone but there was no care, no love in her voice as if she was asking for the sake of asking.

It wasn’t long after the increase in tiredness that headaches became constant, multiple times a day. I was taking pills with every meal hoping it would calm it down Unfortunately; it never went away.

I refused to eat. Everything was laced with the almond taste; it was all my daughter’s doing.

I became too tired and too weak to even get out of bed. James Always left me a glass of water and two pieces of toast on the bedside table. He would always return home from work to see the water untouched and the toast cold and stale.

He had brought a doctor in one day to see me. An old man who had thought the whole case was ridiculous. I had told him it was arsenic.

‘I can assure you; your loving family would never poison you.’

I insisted that he smell the water and the food beside me. Arsenic is known to have an almond smell and taste to it. He slowly turned to the water, picked it up and inhaled deeply.

He shook his head, and he placed the glass back down. ‘You’re stressed, I know being a mother and keeping the house running is very taxing. My mother used to be the same; sadly, the stress consumed her.’ His wrinkled hands took hold of mine as he looked me in the eyes. ‘Your family would be devastated if that happened to you.’ He patted the top of my hand as he placed it back on the bed.

He turned to face my husband. ‘She just needs plenty of food and rest.’

He left with my husband showing him the way out.

I laid in the darkness of the room for hours, letting sleep consume me every time I opened my eyes back up. The smell of almonds from the food on the side became nauseating, but every time I asked for James to take it away, he would always turn his back to me and walked out.

The door cracked open slowly, letting the light from the hallway creep in. A small lean shadow filled the space on the carpet. Maeve poked her head through the door.

‘You awake?’ She whispered.

I kept silent. I didn’t move or rustle the covers. She stood in the doorway for a moment before fully pushing the door open and walking in.

‘Mummy, you haven’t eaten anything for weeks.’ She stood at the bedside looking at the food.

She turned to face me. She lifted the covers back just enough to reveal my face. She smiled at me.

She picked up the glass of water and brought it closer to me. ‘Daddy says you need to drink and eat to get better.’

The cold glass touched my lips. The almond water made its way into my mouth.

‘I’ll look after you Mummy’ She tipped the glass a bit more. I spluttered as I tried to block the water from running further down my throat. Maeve frowned and put the glass back on the table.

I turned my head and let the remaining water run out of my mouth. I moved to push myself up, but my bones became too heavy for me as a wave of nausea took over. My vision blurred. My head was back on the pillow.

There was a crisp crunch.

I turned to see Maeve looking at me, her innocent face shone through the dark as the light from outside streamed behind her, making her look like an angel sent to help me.

The dry piece of bread was shoved in my mouth. She watched and waited.  I could taste the arsenic on the toast as I held it on my tongue.

Maeve’s brow furrowed. She closed my mouth with her tiny hand while she pinched my nose.

It wasn’t long till I was thrashing about, trying to rip my head away from her hands.

‘Mummy, you need to eat to get better.’ She sounded as if she was on the verge of shedding tears for her sickly mother.

My head began to feel light; I felt as if I was no longer in control of my body as everything, I had control of slowly slipped away. I could no longer feel my hands, my legs or any part of myself. My eyes darted each way until they landed straight above me, looking directly into Maeve’s brown eyes.

There was nothing but darkness. No almond smell, nothing.

Slowly shapes began to form. The dresser at the far end of the room, the vanity by the window where the curtains remained closed.

I managed to turn my head to see, no plate and no glass waiting for me.

The door creaked open, Shedding light into the dark room. With my hazy vision, I could make out my husband's and our daughter's silhouette.

I sat upright; ‘What is she doing here?’ I croaked out, feeling my words scratch the back of my throat.

“What do you mean?’ James looked down at Maeve ‘She just wanted to see how you were doing.’

I could see the evil in her innocent-looking face. She knew what she was trying to do but hadn’t succeeded. She had come back for me. I scooted against the headboard.

‘Don’t come closer!’

‘Will I get sick?’ Maeve asked, confusion painting her face as she looked up at her father.

‘No’ He sighed, shaking his head and walked further in.

James held out a tray and placed it on my lap.

Toast and water.

I had waited for the familiar nauseating smell to hit my nose and stir up a headache like it’s always done.

There was nothing, just normal toast and water. I looked up at them to see concern on my husband’s face as he waited to see if I would begin to eat. Maeve had a knowing smile on her face as she looked at me and waited.